Category Archives: Healing

What is Reiki?


The gentle touch of Reiki reduces stress and anxiety. It promotes relaxation and well-being and can help alleviate burnout.  While it does not directly cure diseases or illnesses it’s a complementary or alternative approach to health.  It can restore physical, emotional, mental and spiritual balance.  

What is Reiki?
Reiki is a Japanese form of energy healing.  It is non-invasive.
The meaning of the word comes from 2 Japanese words.  The first word being rei meaning universal.  The second word being ki meaning the vital life force energy flowing through all living things.  (This life force is also known as chi, qi or prana.)

Where is Reiki Used?
Reiki is used in private clinics and practices as well as in hospitals, nursing homes, palliative care hospices and community services in many places around the world.  It is also offered as part of workplace wellness programmes.

In Person Session or Distant?
Most Reiki sessions take place in person.  You will either sit in the chair or lie on a massage fully clothed.   The practitioner will usually use up to 12 -15 hand positions during the session.

Distant or remote Reiki can also be effective.  A session can take place by video or phone but can also be done effectively with a photo or a crystal.  Reiki uses symbols and the distant symbol would be used for a distant session.  The client’s consent is always requested.

Where did Reiki Originate?
Reiki originated in Japan in the early 20th Century.   
Mikao Usui founded a clinic and school in Tokyo in the 1920’s.  Dr. Hayashi would take over the teachings when Mikao Usui passed away.  Mrs Haway Takato, a student of Dr Hayashi, would bring Reiki to the West.  She would practise and teach in Hawaii.  In the 1970’s Mrs Takato would introduce Reiki to the USA mainland.

Science & Reiki
The studies on Reiki are small but their are some overlapping studies that indicate that Reiki can be effective in reducing anxiety and depressive symptoms and increasing overall well being.

It’s been about 10 years since I received my Reiki attunements.  Since that time I regularly use Reiki on myself, my family, other connections  (always with their consent) and even family pets.  This has been done ‘in-person’ and ‘by distance’.

My  first hand experience of Reiki goes back further. I have been receiving Reiki healing from a Reiki Master and practitioner for about 12 years.  These sessions continue and I have one every 3-4 weeks.  Sometimes, more often if required.  The Reiki sessions keep me calm and grounded.   As you can tell, I am an advocate of Reiki and offer distant Reiki sessions as well as coaching.

Clare Lavender is a mother, creative entrepreneur, a mosaic artist, an accredited life coach, and facilitator of workshops on personal development, The Desire Map (by Danielle LaPorte) and mosaics. As well as offering workshops, Clare offers one on one sessions to women.  These are available to women all around the globe.

Clare has also created her own ‘Daring, Divorced and Divine’ coaching programme for women. This programme is aimed at inspiring, empowering and supporting women to move on to greater well-being following divorce.

In 2013, Clare was privileged to be invited to be part of a compilation book, ‘In the Spirit of Abundance’.  A number of inspiring authors including best-selling authors, Jack Canfield and Mark Victor Hansen from the highly successful ‘Chicken Soup for the Soul’ book series, were involved, as well as Brian Tracy,  Arielle Ford and local Sandy Forster.

Clare has a strong business background, having worked as a PA/EA and Practice Manager.  She is also trained in human resources management.  Clare has worked in several small to medium legal practices in her local area as well as ‘temping’ in larger practices based in Sydney.  Clare assisted in the set-up and management of  (a family business) and one of the first specialist family law practices in the region before moving on to work in a more creative field.

Clare is a Reiki practitioner.

If you are interested in any further information, working with me one on one or joining a workshop please contact Clare at or visit


What the **** is a Life Enhancement Coach?

A Life Enhancement Coach can support you to take inspired action to reach your goals.   But what’s more, a Coach can also support you in becoming more conscious, mindful and grateful, empowering you in the process.

A Vision

Have you ever had a dream or a vision for your life?   You start to dream big and envisage the way it will unfold. But there is something holding you back?   Maybe you experience a hiccup or minor set-back and you stop dead in your tracks?   Why?  Because you begin to invest in fear………… doubt yourself…………, second guess yourself…………… question your worthiness to have what you desire…… or  you begin to listen to the naysayers.

A Secret

Sometimes, this vision is something so precious to you, that you dare not share it with anyone, for the fear of  it being dismissed or worse still ridiculed.  It then becomes your little secret, tucked away safe from the world.

But what if your dream could be explored, or even better still, have the opportunity to be realised?  

Winds of Change

Sometimes, people engage a Coach, because the winds of change have swept through and their life no longer resembles the one with which they were so familiar.  Change can bring about the greatest challenges and your deepest fears.     This is where a Life Coach, or as I prefer, a Life Enhancement Coach can offer you genuine but objective support.  It means that you don’t have to go it alone.  A Coach can help you charter a course through unfamiliar waters.

What a Life Coach is not…….

A Life Coach is not a Psychotherapist or a Counsellor.  Therapy can often focus on past trauma and issues.  Often  with therapy,  the starting point and focus is on the why.

What a Life Coach is……

When it comes to coaching, the focus is more on the how.  A Coach can support and guide you in moving from your current reality to your desired future reality.  In the process, you clarify goals,  identify and work through any obstacles or sabotage that can hold you back.  These obstacles and sabotage can come in many forms.  Fear, confusion, doubt, limiting beliefs and overwhelm are some prime examples.


Goals don’t necessarily relate to success and achievement in the traditional sense – certainly not as we have come to perceive them in the western world. Sometimes, what you might be reaching for……….. is a sense of greater well-being and a better relationship with yourself.  There is no greater success than self-acceptance and  inner peace.

Or perhaps it is a bad habit or a recurring limiting belief that you choose to work through and overcome. It is all part of becoming the best version of yourself.

As you work on the inner world, the outer world will follow suit.

Do Coaches use coaching services?

Yes, I believe so.  I certainly do.  Friends and family can offer so much support, but sometimes you need more.  This could be objectivity and accountability that those closest to you can’t always offer. As a Coach, has said to me,   “You don’t go to a hardware for milk.”

What can you expect from me, as a Life Enhancement Coach? 

Generally, when it comes to life coaching, I make the following assumptions, based on the work by Cherie Carter Scott, Ph. D, who founded the first coach training programme back in the 1970’s.

  The first assumption is that as a client you have the answers to your challenges. 

The second assumption is that as a client, you possess the personal power to make these answers a reality.

The third assumption is that as a client, you can have your visions, dreams or goals become a reality.

How is a Coaching Session Conducted?

Coaching sessions can be conducted face and face however, many sessions are actually conducted by phone or Skype for example.  There have actually been studies undertaken that concluded that non-face to face coaching is highly effective, if not more effective than face to face coaching.

What should you look for in a Coach?

If you are looking to engage the services of a Coach you are making a commitment to yourself.   There is an awareness that you are now ready to take this step, so finding the right Coach to work with is very important.

A professional Coach will be committed to you as a client.  When it comes to communication, your Coach should ask about your vision or ideal outcome.  Your Coach will ask open ended questions, pick up on clues, recap at least once per session. The Coach will acknowledge when there is confusion and work with you to clarify this. There will be an awareness and understanding of your needs during your session.  Your Coach will be able to empathise with you and will be non-judgemental at all times.  Objectivity will be apparent, yet your Coach will have a genuine interest in you.   You will feel supported, but not directed by your Coach as your Coach will believe in your abilities.  You will leave each coaching session with a plan.

Discovery Session

As a Life Enhancement Coach, I recommend and offer a Discovery Session.  This is an initial  ‘getting to know you’ coaching session.  My Discovery Sessions flow more or less as a regular coaching session, based on the principles as outlined above.

A Discovery Session enables you to, firstly sample a coaching session with me.  Secondly, this session is to determine if we would be a great coaching ‘fit’, which is so important,  should you wish to continue with coaching.    The session allows me to get a feel for how I might best support you and it offers you the opportunity to gain some clarity.

From July, 2017, I have opened up times on Thursdays and Fridays, for Discovery Sessions. Discovery Sessions run for 45 – 60 minutes.  These sessions will be offered via phone or Skype.   For the months of July,  August and September, 2017, the cost is $70.00 AUD. For initial enquiries, please contact me, via email at  I will then send you a link to book an appointment.


In The Spirit of Abundance – A book to inspire, empower and support.



About the Book

In 2013, I had the opportunity and privilege to take part in a book entitled, In the Spirit of Abundance.  The sole theme of the book obviously is that of abundance.  One theme, perhaps, but abundance can mean different things to different people at different times in their lives. Abundance can show up as  freedom, wealth, good health, opportunities, doing fulfilling work and so much more.  This diversity is so clearly depicted in this book.

As Sandy Forster states, in the foreword of this book, “abundance can be defined in many different ways.  If you were to ask a thousand people what their definition of abundance is, you would (sic) a thousand very diverse answers, each of them with their own definition of what abundance means to them”.

This book for me is both positive and uplifting. We all face challenges at some point or another and there are times when these challenges seem insurmountable. If you are in this place, you can take comfort in knowing you are not alone.  Others have gone before you and have come through to the other side, and while it can seem hard to believe, they are actually stronger and so much greater for having had the experience. This is what this book is all about. The personal stories shared, offer hope. 

Best-selling Authors

As well as the personal recounts, there are contributions made by several best-selling authors to the book.  Sandy Forster, who compiled the stories is one such best-selling author.  Sandy’s journey took her from living on welfare, with two small children, to becoming a millionaire and a best-selling author.

Jack Canfield and Mark Victor Hansen make a contribution to the book, with a chapter based on habits and how they really work.  Jack Canfield and Mark Victor Hansen are best-selling authors and probably best known for their hugely successful Chicken Soup for the Soul, series of books.

Brian Tracy is another best-selling author, having written over 70 books including, ‘Eat That Frog!: 21 Great Ways to Stop Procrastinating and Get More Done in Less Time’.  He is also a global leader in self-development.  His contribution to the book is on the topics of changing your thinking and on the importance of being an optimist at all times.

Arielle Ford is yet another best-selling author who has written 8 books.  Her latest book, ‘Turn Your Mate into Your Soulmate:  A Practical Guide to Happily Ever After’, is due for release in late December, 2015.  Arielle’s chapter featured in this book, is about finding a soul mate/life partner.  She outlines the top 10 things to do and to remember to attract a soul mate into your life – no matter your age.

My Experience

Being part of this book brought up so many feelings. It brought up fear in ways I couldn’t have imagined.  My mind went into overdrive.  Was I ready to share anything about myself in such a public way?  It brought up feelings around worthiness. Who was I to be in this book?  I am no-one special  This sort of experience happens to women every day – how will my story make a difference?

In the end, I went with my gut feeling which told me to go ahead.  I stepped out of my comfort zone.  I felt the fear, but decided to contribute to the book despite that fear.

Once I began to put together my chapter I wondered how I could get my story across in a mere 1200 words? I had built up a life of which I felt certain, over the course of almost 20 years. Now it had been completely dismantled.  There were so many layers, so many feelings, and so many words.    How could I possibly condense that into 1200 words?  I would need that number, just for the introduction.  But I did it. I got the words down onto paper. I just went with it.  It was actually a cleansing experience.

When the book was published, the fears arose all over again.  I wondered if my contribution was good enough?  In my mind, the other co-authors had more to offer.  They had come through the storm and found success.   I, on the other hand, had managed to find abundance in the form of courage and strength to let go, but my success or what I defined as success was still a work in progress.  

I think the greatest concern for me when the book was published was that I wanted to protect those I loved.  I didn’t want to cause embarrassment or any hurt – not that there was anything damaging in my words.  But there had been enough hurt.  As it turned out, my ex-husband had been involved in affairs during the course of our marriage.  Along with the affairs, came a web of lies, deception and betrayal. Nothing good can come from living a life in that way and nothing did.  The exceptions were the lessons that it brought and the wonderful children that came from the marriage.

Now is the time.   I have walked a fine line between speaking my truth and protecting those I love. My children are now young adults.   It is time for me.  It’s time to take ownership of my story – without shaming or blaming.   As Brene Brown states, “you either walk inside your story and own it, or you stand outside your story and hustle for your worthiness.”  I choose to walk inside my story.

Information on ‘In the Spirit of Abundance’ can be found on my website,  You can purchase the book, for AUD $15.95 (plus postage) at my Etsy store.  Here is the link

Clare Lavender is a Mother, Creative Entrepreneur, a Mosaic Artist, an Accredited Life Coach, a Licensee and Facilitator of The Desire Map Workshops (by Danielle LaPorte) and a facilitator of Mosaic workshops.

(This means that I facilitate, create, and deliver one-on-one personal development, life coaching programmes and art therapy workshops for women. I am also pleased to have created my own ‘Daring, Divorced and Divine’ coaching programme for women aimed at inspiring, empowering and supporting women to move on to greater well-being following divorce).

If you are interested in any further information, working with me one on one or joining a workshop please contact Clare at or visit



It All Starts With Your Mind

It All Starts With Your MindChange your thoughts and change your life.  It’s more than just a platitude.

I have noticed that when I talk of the work I am doing, which involves life coaching and facilitating ‘The Desire Map’ workshops,  that I occasionally get the odd look. Don’t get me wrong, there are many who embrace this work and get a great deal from it, but every now and again there is some resistance. I get it. I have to remember that there was a time, a few years back, when I might have reacted in the same way.

Breaking It Down
When I look at it, much of the work covered in the workshops, is really breaking things down to their most simplistic form. It’s an opportunity to strip back many of the superficial layers and to get back to what matters most. It is also an opportunity to explore and examine thoughts and feelings in the key areas of your life, to reveal what you truly desire. Sometimes you can lose sight of your hopes or dreams or sometimes you stray too far from who you truly are.

I know personally, whenever I have strayed too far from who I am, who I really truly am, I become quite miserable. When I am saying, doing or behaving in a way that really is not who I am, to conform or fit in, then I am basically betraying myself. I pay for that in a big way and the cost is my happiness.

New Research
What is so exciting about the work I am doing is the new research and information that is becoming available.  In a world that is constantly changing, at a rapid rate, it is so easy to feel at the mercy of external circumstances and events. Much of what I am discovering is that you have so many inner resources and that so much of it starts with your mind and the way you think.  This can have an enormous impact on your general well-being and every aspect of your life.

Many breakthroughs through research and new levels of understanding have occurred in the past decade or so. If I can embrace this new information, to get more out of life, then I am all for it. I like to bring some of this information to my workshops and so I touch on the following three areas.  These are neuroplasticity, epigenetics and the relationship between gratitude and joy.

In the late 1990’s, there was a landmark study which revealed that the human brain is malleable. This is referred to as neuroplasticity. This finding was a significant advancement in the field of neuroscience because prior to the 1990’s study, the human brain was believed to be pretty much hardwired and rigid. What you were born with, you were stuck with. It was thought that you were born with a certain number of brain cells, you lost a few of them each and every day and they were never to be replaced.

The new groundbreaking findings revealed that the brain was not only able to produce new brain cells, replacing the lost cells but in being malleable, it was able to transform itself. This transformation occurs in the brain’s structure, function and connections and is in response to internal and external stimuli. This stimuli includes your thoughts and beliefs.

So what does this mean for you? In her book, ‘Sane New World – Taming the Mind’, Ruby Wax explains that, “you can change your mind and how you think. When your mind changes, your brain changes and because our brains are so malleable, the sky’s the limit”.

Ruby Wax, a writer and a  comedian, has dealt with depression most of her adult life. She has experienced some very challenging times with this mental illness.  It has resulted in her being hospitalised when she has been particularly unwell.

Initially, Wax began doing her own research and investigation and then went on to gain a masters in mindfulness and a degree in psychotherapy. The knowledge she has acquired helps her manage her illness and she shares this information with others. She is now an active mental health campaigner.

From reading ‘Sane New World – Taming the Mind’, I gained an understanding of the way in which the brain works and the way in which neuroplasticity works. Her book is a great read and there are many practical exercises on living more mindfully.  There is also so much humour in her style of writing, you might find yourself laughing out loud often.

Another recent advancement in science is in the area of epigenetics. Bruce Lipton, in his book, ‘The Biology of Belief’, states that this new science “literally means ‘control above the genes’”. What this means is that, “the activity of our genes is constantly being modified in response to life experiences”, as Lipton explains it.  Your environment, diet, behaviour, beliefs and thoughts can all affect your genes and the way in which they are expressed.  In the past it was believed that we were at the mercy of our genes.  According to Lipton, that is not the case and that “we are not victims of our genes, but masters of our fates, able to create lives overflowing with peace, happiness and love”.

In ‘The Desire Map’ workshops I facilitate, there is a component of the course which concentrates on gratitude.  It’s basically where you take stock of where you are at and you examine what is working and what is not.

Brene Brown is a Research Professor. whose extensive research has resulted in her becoming a thought leader in the areas of vulnerability, courage, worthiness and shame.

In her book, ‘The Gifts of Imperfection’, she devotes a chapter in the book to Cultivating Gratitude and Joy. Brown makes the point that, “one of the most profound changes in my life happened when I got my head around the relationship between gratitude and joy”. Her research findings on joy revealed that those people who actively practiced gratitude “described themselves as joyful”. It was so much more that just an attitude. Those people “attributed their joyfulness to their gratitude practice”. The practice of gratitude included such things as maintaining gratitude journals or taking time out to do daily gratitude meditations.

So, it all starts in the mind.  If you ever hear the expression “change your thoughts and change your life” there is actually some scientific and factual evidence now to support the statement. The statement is more than just a platitude.

If you would like to learn any more about the workshops or coaching I offer, visit

Clare Lavender is a Mother, Creative Entrepreneur, Mentor, Accredited Life Coach and Mosaic Artist who will be hosting the Level 1 Desire Map workshop at the Creative Fringe. For further information about the workshops, contact Clare at or you can visit



The Painted Picture

Welcome to my inaugural blog post!

It has been quite a journey to get to this point with many twists and turns along the way.  Life sometimes has a way of throwing you in at the deep end and that has certainly been the case for me.  I have been on an enormous learning curve in so many ways, the least of which has been coming to grips with social media.  I still have a way to go but I am certainly enjoying the ride.

After some major unexpected life changes I have come to view life in a very different way from the way I did a decade ago, in my thirties.  I have endured a great deal of pain, heartache as well as an enormous amount of loss.  At the same time I have also experienced an incredible amount of personal growth.  I’d just like to say for the record, that I would have been perfectly happy to accept the growth without the pain, but that was not to be.

The events that I experienced would bring me to my knees.  I would hit rock bottom but I would come to terms with this, eventually.  Rebuilding at this level meant that I could at least make sure that I put into place firm footings and solid foundations for a new start.

In the beginning, all I would be able to do is get myself out of bed and put one foot in front of the other and go about my day to day activities in a state of numbness. Living life like this was incredibly difficult but I would continue on this way until life would become a little less painful to live. I had two perfectly good reasons to get out of bed and live each day the best way I could and these were my two beautiful children.

For me, a great deal of healing has taken place but there is still more healing to be done. There always is.  On my journey, I have explored different modalities of healing from the traditional to the alternative to find what combination worked for me.  In future posts I hope to share these, with my readers and my clients, as my experience may make the road ahead a little easier you.

Life experience has provided me with an excellent education and I have worked, read, studied and practised much of what I have been learning over the years.  This has brought me, I hope, to a greater understanding of myself and a greater appreciation of the need for compassion for myself and other people.  I feel I am now able to help others much more than if I did not have the experiences that have come to me.

Now, I create a painted picture of how I want my life to be.  I am more selective about the people I allow into my life.  I have learnt to trust my intuition more and act upon it. I practice mindfulness so that I can take the reins of life more rather than feeling I am at its’ mercy.  I work more and more on living a truly authentic life each and every day.   When I am true to myself in the choices I make, I know that I experience peace and happiness.  Of course, I am human, I am far from perfect and I struggle from time to time but this is my new approach to life.  This is the life I crave, desire and above all else, deserve.  At times, this all falls into place and comes easily and other times it is extremely difficult as I face the stresses of daily life which don’t always to support my new approach. Regardless, of this I persist and focus on appreciating the good things in my life, at all times.

To achieve my painted picture there have been a number of processes, many of them fun and enjoyable which I have put into action and I hope to also share these with you, my readers and my clients.  I know that these processes can make an enormous difference in people’s lives because I have not only experienced it but I have also seen it with my very own eyes occurring in other people’s lives.

My aim is to make my blog posts to informative, fun and insightful. I also aim to develop my website at as a sanctuary with lots of information and free downloads.  This is all a work in progress and a continuation of my learning.

Anyway, this has been my first Blog post so I hope that’s the way it’s done.  Until next time, best wishes to all,

Clare xx